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李银河:我年轻时当然是文艺女青年

来源: 南方日报网络版     时间: 2019年05月22日 08:40:11
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宝鸡开商务服务费发票██【电\微 15813★310971 李先生】【Q; 25880★8054】 ██▓信誉100%,专业100%,选择我们长期合作共赢!公司经百度推广!李银河:我年轻时当然是文艺女青年

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(  采)(写)(李)(银)(河)(那)(篇)(稿)(子)(的)(原)(标)(题)(为)(《李)(银)(河)(:在)(荒)(岛)(上)(迎)(接)(黎)(明)(》,取)(自)(王)(小)(波)(的)(一)(个)(短)(篇)(小)(说)(名)(。标)(题)(的)(灵)(感)(源)(于)(和)(李)(银)(河)(交)(谈)(的)(三)(小)(时)(里)(,她)(每)(每)(讲)(起)(从)(学)(者)(踏)(入)(公)(共)(领)(域)(所)(面)(临)(的)(误)(解)(、争)(议)(和)(人)(身)(攻)(击)(时)(,都)(让)(我)(想)(起)(那)(个)(“荒)(岛)(”。我)(的)(脑)(海)(中)(几)(次)(划)(过)(了)(那)(篇)(小)(说)(里)(的)(一)(句)(话)(:“我)(希)(望)(自)(已)(也)(是)(一)(颗)(星)(星)(:如)(果)(我)(会)(发)(光)(,就)(不)(必)(害)(怕)(黑)(暗)(。”  从)(小)(就)(对)(李)(银)(河)(充)(满)(想)(象)(  约)(采)(李)(银)(河)(的)(机)(会)(大)(概)(算)(是)(我)(跟)(部)(门)(争)(取)(来)(的)(,我)(几)(乎)(从)(未)(对)(任)(何)(采)(访)(对)(象)(有)(过)(如)(此)(高)(的)(热)(忱)(。这)(种)(热)(忱)(要)(追)(溯)(到)(我)(十)(几)(岁)(时)(。  从)(高)(中)(开)(始)(我)(就)(是)(王)(小)(波)(的)(书)(迷)(,每)(逢)(大)(考)(小)(考)(的)(备)(考)(期)(间)(,王)(小)(波)(的)(小)(说)(几)(乎)(是)(我)(唯)(一)(的)(娱)(乐)(生)(活)(。而)(王)(小)(波)(和)(李)(银)(河)(的)(书)(信)(集)(《爱)(你)(就)(像)(爱)(生)(命)(》就)(如)(同)(我)(年)(少)(时)(代)(的)(爱)(情)(圣)(经)(。“我)(的)(灵)(魂)(里)(有)(很)(多)(地)(方)(玩)(世)(不)(恭)(,对)(人)(傲)(慢)(无)(礼)(,但)(是)(它)(有)(一)(个)(核)(心)(,这)(个)(核)(心)(害)(怕)(黑)(暗)(,柔)(弱)(得)(像)(绵)(羊)(一)(样)(。只)(有)(顶)(平)(等)(的)(友)(爱)(才)(能)(使)(他)(得)(到)(安)(慰)(。你)(对)(我)(是)(属)(于)(这)(个)(核)(心)(的)(。”从)(那)(时)(起)(,对)(“性)(学)(家)(”李)(银)(河)(几)(乎)(毫)(无)(所)(知)(的)(我)(,就)(对)(王)(小)(波)(“灵)(魂)(核)(心)(”里)(的)(人)(、那)(些)(动)(人)(的)(情)(话)(所)(指)(向)(的)(恋)(人)(充)(满)(了)(想)(象)(。  大)(学)(开)(始)(,我)(接)(触)(到)(酷)(儿)(理)(论)(和)(性)(别)(平)(权)(运)(动)(。作)(为)(一)(名)(女)(权)(主)(义)(者)(,李)(银)(河)(老)(师)(可)(以)(说)(对)(我)(有)(着)(启)(蒙)(作)(用)(,我)(通)(过)(她)(的)(学)(术)(著)(作)(认)(识)(了)(波)(伏)(娃)(、福)(柯)(、朱)(迪)(斯)(·巴)(特)(勒)(等)(在)(我)(后)(来)(的)(学)(术)(生)(涯)(中)(的)(精)(神)(偶)(像)(。那)(时)(候)(,对)(我)(来)(说)(,王)(小)(波)(昔)(日)(恋)(人)(的)(浪)(漫)(化)(想)(象)(在)(李)(银)(河)(身)(上)(渐)(渐)(褪)(去)(了)(。她)(更)(是)(一)(位)(学)(者)(、性)(学)(家)(,这)(身)(份)(丝)(毫)(不)(着)(浪)(漫)(色)(彩)(,反)(倒)(使)(她)(在)(社)(会)(中)(饱)(受)(非)(议)(。  “我)(当)(然)(是)(文)(艺)(女)(青)(年)(”  对)(于)(这)(一)(次)(采)(访)(,我)(做)(足)(了)(我)(所)(能)(做)(的)(所)(有)(准)(备)(工)(作)(,带)(着)(我)(所)(有)(的)(好)(奇)(和)(敬)(重)(,迎)(来)(了)(这)(一)(天)(。然)(而)(这)(一)(切)(充)(分)(的)(采)(访)(准)(备)(并)(不)(能)(抵)(消)(我)(作)(为)(一)(个)(冒)(失)(的)(“双)(鱼)(座)(患)(者)(”的)(本)(性)(。我)(并)(未)(给)(北)(京)(该)(死)(的)(交)(通)(预)(留)(出)(足)(够)(的)(堵)(车)(时)(间)(,当)(我)(气)(喘)(吁)(吁)(地)(赶)(到)(和)(李)(银)(河)(老)(师)(约)(定)(的)(咖)(啡)(馆)(时)(,已)(经)(迟)(到)(了)(整)(整)(二)(十)(分)(钟)(。  李)(银)(河)(老)(师)(正)(独)(自)(坐)(在)(咖)(啡)(馆)(等)(着)(我)(,看)(到)(我)(狼)(狈)(的)(样)(子)(,她)(并)(没)(有)(露)(出)(责)(怪)(之)(情)(。年)(逾)(六)(十)(的)(她)(看)(起)(来)(随)(和)(而)(又)(敦)(厚)(,让)(初)(识)(者)(难)(以)(把)(这)(位)(谦)(和)(的)(女)(士)(和)(那)(个)(观)(念)(“惊)(世)(骇)(俗)(”、站)(在)(舆)(论)(风)(口)(浪)(尖)(上)(的)(性)(学)(家)(联)(系)(起)(来)(;更)(不)(用)(说)(那)(个)(王)(小)(波)(字)(里)(行)(间)(里)(倾)(斜)(出)(浓)(浓)(爱)(意)(的)(昔)(日)(恋)(人)(。  几)(杯)(茶)(下)(去)(,对)(话)(渐)(入)(佳)(境)(,李)(银)(河)(逐)(渐)(表)(现)(出)(了)(面)(对)(一)(个)(记)(者)(时)(难)(得)(的)(坦)(诚)(和)(率)(性)(,那)(种)(“毫)(无)(戒)(备)(”让)(这)(位)(六)(十)(岁)(的)(女)(性)(看)(起)(来)(有)(种)(赤)(子)(般)(的)(可)(爱)(。当)(我)(问)(到)(,年)(轻)(时)(的)(她)(是)(不)(是)(现)(在)(话)(语)(中)(的)(“文)(艺)(女)(青)(年)(”时)(,李)(银)(河)(不)(假)(思)(索)(地)(说)(,“我)(当)(然)(是)(啦)(!不)(是)(文)(艺)(女)(青)(年)(怎)(么)(能)(和)(王)(小)(波)(这)(种)(文)(艺)(男)(青)(年)(搞)(在)(一)(起)(!”我)(们)(都)(笑)(了)(。  她)(骄)(傲)(地)(说)(起)(了)(她)(和)(王)(小)(波)(是)(如)(何)(前)(卫)(地)(选)(择)(“丁)(克)(”,又)(调)(侃)(着)(他)(们)(如)(何)(在)(经)(济)(地)(位)(上)(“阴)(盛)(阳)(衰)(”。八)(十)(年)(代)(的)(岁)(月)(让)(她)(六)(十)(岁)(的)(双)(眼)(放)(出)(了)(青)(年)(人)(那)(种)(戏)(谑)(而)(又)(坚)(毅)(的)(光)(芒)(,似)(乎)(那)(段)(叛)(逆)(又)(前)(卫)(的)(日)(子)(从)(未)(走)(远)(过)(。  面)(对)(攻)(击)(,她)(格)(外)(脆)(弱)(  当)(我)(们)(聊)(到)(这)(些)(年)(她)(走)(出)(学)(术)(圈)(,作)(为)(一)(名)(公)(共)(知)(识)(分)(子)(在)(舆)(论)(界)(饱)(受)(争)(议)(的)(日)(子)(时)(,李)(银)(河)(的)(表)(情)(里)(流)(露)(出)(细)(微)(的)(让)(人)(怜)(悯)(的)(脆)(弱)(。她)(对)(于)(社)(会)(中)(一)(些)(愚)(昧)(的)(攻)(击)(感)(到)(愤)(怒)(,也)(感)(到)(心)(痛)(。她)(说)(,作)(为)(一)(个)(女)(性)(,尤)(其)(是)(作)(为)(一)(个)(老)(年)(女)(性)(,这)(些)(身)(份)(让)(她)(在)(公)(共)(舆)(论)(中)(承)(受)(的)(攻)(击)(显)(得)(更)(加)(刻)(薄)(。  提)(起)(网)(友)(们)(人)(身)(攻)(击)(她)(,骂)(她)(“老)(妖)(婆)(”时)(,她)(轻)(轻)(顿)(了)(一)(下)(,这)(个)(词)(语)(对)(她)(来)(说)(似)(乎)(仍)(然)(是)(难)(以)(启)(齿)(的)(。当)(那)(三)(个)(字)(从)(她)(嘴)(里)(微)(弱)(地)(蹦)(出)(来)(时)(,我)(隐)(隐)(感)(到)(一)(种)(不)(小)(心)(揭)(人)(“疮)(疤)(”的)(不)(忍)(。她)(说)(外)(貌)(、年)(龄)(和)(性)(别)(都)(让)(她)(面)(对)(攻)(击)(时)(格)(外)(的)(脆)(弱)(,但)(她)(对)(这)(一)(切)(无)(能)(为)(力)(,只)(好)(充)(耳)(不)(闻)(,不)(再)(看)(博)(客)(下)(面)(的)(评)(论)(。在)(这)(一)(刻)(,她)(不)(是)(那)(个)(满)(载)(光)(环)(的)(已)(故)(作)(家)(的)(爱)(人)(,不)(是)(那)(个)(循)(循)(善)(诱)(的)(学)(者)(,她)(只)(是)(一)(个)(在)(不)(平)(等)(的)(两)(性)(结)(构)(面)(前)(不)(堪)(一)(击)(的)(女)(性)(。  而)(我)(,作)(为)(一)(名)(有)(着)(女)(权)(意)(识)(的)(年)(轻)(女)(性)(,对)(这)(些)(刻)(薄)(而)(又)(毫)(无)(道)(理)(的)(攻)(击)(深)(恶)(痛)(绝)(,并)(且)(感)(同)(身)(受)(。因)(为)(我)(深)(深)(地)(意)(识)(到)(我)(也)(会)(衰)(老)(,也)(会)(因)(为)(这)(一)(切)(在)(既)(有)(的)(性)(别)(结)(构)(中)(感)(到)(无)(能)(为)(力)(。于)(是)(在)(那)(一)(刻)(,交)(谈)(不)(再)(像)(一)(个)(记)(者)(和)(一)(个)(受)(访)(对)(象)(,更)(像)(是)(两)(个)(女)(人)(面)(对)(不)(平)(等)(结)(构)(时)(的)(同)(病)(相)(怜)(。  不)(知)(不)(觉)(三)(个)(小)(时)(过)(去)(了)(,我)(早)(已)(忘)(了)(先)(前)(列)(好)(的)(采)(访)(提)(纲)(,谈)(话)(就)(那)(么)(酣)(畅)(淋)(漓)(地)(顺)(着)(各)(种)(细)(枝)(末)(节)(聊)(了)(下)(去)(,当)(然)(这)(也)(给)(我)(在)(后)(期)(整)(理)(采)(访)(录)(音)(的)(时)(候)(带)(来)(了)(无)(穷)(的)(麻)(烦)(。我)(不)(知)(道)(我)(近)(乎)(“如)(饥)(似)(渴)(”的)(追)(问)(和)(表)(达)(是)(否)(让)(李)(银)(河)(老)(师)(有)(过)(那)(么)(一)(些)(疲)(惫)(和)(厌)(倦)(。但)(这)(次)(对)(话)(,以)(及)(其)(中)(带)(给)(我)(的)(种)(种)(动)(容)(,是)(让)(我)(无)(比)(心)(满)(意)(足)(的)(。  最)(后)(,我)(其)(实)(不)(愿)(再)(提)(起)(:作)(为)(一)(名)(无)(药)(可)(救)(的)(双)(鱼)(座)(患)(者)(,我)(出)(门)(前)(竟)(忘)(记)(带)(银)(行)(卡)(,在)(打)(了)(两)(趟)(车)(以)(及)(被)(黑)(车)(司)(机)(狠)(狠)(宰)(了)(一)(笔)(之)(后)(,在)(咖)(啡)(馆)(才)(发)(现)(我)(剩)(下)(的)(钱)(竟)(然)(不)(够)(买)(单)(。李)(银)(河)(老)(师)(临)(别)(前)(慈)(爱)(地)(笑)(了)(笑)(,付)(了)(钱)(,对)(我)(说)(,“你)(下)(次)(要)(注)(意)(呀)(!”  新)(京)(报)(记)(者)(伍)(勤)(  (本)(文)(首)(发)(新)(京)(报)(新)(媒)(体)(,您)(可)(以)(在)(微)(信)(中)(搜)(索)(公)(众)(号)(“新)(京)(报)(”,或)(添)(加)(微)(信)(号)(:bjnews_xjb了)(解)(更)(多)(精)(彩)(内)(容)())!

作者:【龙虎和代理】


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